As Blackpool suffered the ignominy of relegation after defeat to Manchester United on Sunday, they will be sorely missed not only for their attacking football, but also their manager Ian Holloway as he gave us much entertainment fodder not last seen in the Premier League since José Mourinho.
Here are some of his memorable quotes, which would be in relative be on par with Eric Cantona’s infamous quotes.
He carries the weight of the blame on his shoulders entirely:
“Apparently it’s my fault that the Titanic sank.”
and then how much we are still stuck in the ice age:
“Why haven’t they got cameras? The officials can speak to each other easily enough now. Why aren’t we using laptops that are linked up and can give a decision in five seconds? A chimpanzee could do it – with not much training. We might as well go back to being cavemen, grab our girl by the hair, drag her into the cave whether she wants to come in or not because we may as well live in that age. We’ve come forward, haven’t we? “
and then on the prospect on having to call David Beckham Sir:
“Sir David Beckham? You’re having a laugh. He’s just a good footballer with a famous bird. Can you imagine if Posh was called Lady Beckham? We’d never hear the end of it!”
and not forgetting Cristiano Ronaldo:
“He’s six foot something, fit as a flea, good looking – he’s got to have something wrong with him. Hopefully he’s hung like a hamster – That would make us all feel better. Having said that, me missus has got a pet hamster at home, and his cock’s massive.”
and in tribute to Michael Jackson:
“He was a very special bloke and one of a handful of people I am proud to have been on the planet at the same time as. The Beatles, Elvis, Muhammad Ali… they are the great figures of our age. David Beckham will be one day too. They are icons… In fact, when we go to Fulham I’ll take a little hacksaw, smuggle the statue on the team bus and take it home with me.”
and him following in the footsteps of Potato:
“Every dog has its day, and today is woof day! Today I just want to bark!”
and how much he loves Donkeys:
“You are talking out of your hat. I would like to say out of your ass, but that’s a donkey and I don’t like having a go at donkeys.”
and as Blackpool were relegated he decided it was because the fat lady had stopped singing:
“The fat lady has finished singing and unfortunately I don’t like her tune. That’s it in football. You’re famous for two seconds in football and then you’re gone.”
and summing everything up fittingly:
“Football is a very small part of the universe, and Blackpool is tiny in comparison, but we are trying to make ourselves as good as we can be and are being run as sensibly as we can be run … We are all trying our best. I’ve never met a manager or a player who deliberately goes out to lose or doesn’t try his best. They might be on a lot of money, a ridiculously obscene amount of money, but they are still trying. It’s a funny old world and I just wish everyone health and happiness, but I am not going to lose mine over a game.”
About Ian Holloway
Ian Scott Holloway was born on 12 March 1963. Ian Holloway is the current manager of Blackpool, and was a former footballer from 1981 to 1999. His career span has seen him play as a midfielder for Bristol Rovers, Wimbledon, Brentford, Torquay United, and Queens Park Rangers in the Premier League. His former managerial portfolio includes QPR, Plymouth Argyle and Leicester City.
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